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Severus should have left by now, having completed his task. But he couldn't stop looking into the fog rolling in through the canals from the bay, swallowing up the small boats, the houses and the low bridges, already now swirling around his ankles. It moved fast, unstoppable and chilling, not only in its physical temperature, but also in the eerie muffled silence it created around him, and the lack of clear vision.

Wishful thinking. )

Muse: Severus Snape
Fandom: Harry Potter
Wordcount: 357
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I brew potions.

The simple task of cutting, crushing, grounding, pulverising different ingredients and then adding them together in their correct amounts, at the correct times and in a correct order, relaxes me.

The soft bubbling of cauldrons; The different scents wafting past my nose, indicating the different stages in the potions' preparation and completion; The colours swirling and changing, showing me whether it is a success or a failure...

To others, it might seem a chore to brew potions, but even the simplest of concoctions have attractions or fascinating intricacies of their own.

The way Skele-gro, just before it is finished, changes from deep maroon to crystal clear in a matter of seconds, in those short fragile moments spreading a scent of vanilla in the room...

How Pepper-up makes the laboratory smell like an Indian bazaar, full of spices...

The fact, that if you stir Calming Draught counter-clock wise within the first 3 minutes and 33 seconds of its brewing, the draught will solidify into a black block of useless scoria, while it stays a smooth, pale green and thin liquid when stirred clock-wise.

All small insignificant things that tend to get lost in the wider perspective of brewing, but something you notice when you focus, enjoy ... relax.

Wordcount: 210
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iTunes Prophecies: Go to your iTunes playlist and put it all on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and after each one press play. Use the song title as the answer to the question.

I used Winamp, but the result should not be any different.

1. What do you think of me, iTunes (Winamp)?
Kiss from a Rose (Seal)
A thorny pleasure...

2. Will I have a happy life?
Forgive me (Evanescence)
Depends, I presume.

3. What do my friends really think of me?
The eyes of truth (Enigma)
What truth?

4. Do people secretly lust after me?
The funeral of hearts (H.I.M.)
I'll take that as a no.

5. What does Remus think of me?
One (Alanis Morisette)
Yes, I am one...

6. How can I make myself happy?
Narcissus (Alanis Morisette)
Excessive self-love is something I've never indulged myself in, but perhaps self-loathing is the wrong way as well.

7. What should I do with my life?
More than words can say (Extreme)

8. Why must life be so full of pain?
Sweetest perfection (depeche mode)
Because perfection is impossible, and still we want it, seek it, need it...

9. How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Different Delusions (Shawn Colvin)
Is pleasure just a delusion?

10. Will I ever have children?
Sympathetic character (Alanis Morisette)
I think that will be a resounding no. Students were enough.

11. Will I die happy?
It's not unusual (Tom Jones)
But not certain either...

12. Can you give me some good advice?
Wicked game (Chris Isaac)
Is that not what I am doing now?

13. Do you know where your children are?
Mea Culpa (Enigma)
I have nothing to say to this.

14. What do you think happiness is?
All I ever wanted (Depeche Mode)
Very true.
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
Severus will be on hiatus for a bit, while I consider what I want to do with him. He hasn't been much involved with anything or anybody lately, and right now the challenges aren't speaking to him (me).

I hope it's simply because work is an uberbitch, but I'll know soon.
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
Severus had never doubted his legilimency skills and their usefulness. If he wanted to, he could know all he wanted to know, about other people. Muggles would be without resistance and even strong wizards or witches would have to be prepared and ready, to repell him.

Not that he actively used this skill very often. Occlumency was his true strength, used, refined and polished over many years. His 'facts', his memories had always been well protected, even in the face of the two strongest wizards of his time.

Of course, memories were always in the eyes of the beholder. What one person saw in a situation, was rarely the same as another would see. It was all a matter of interpretation. And yet, there would always be a grain of truth even in the most warped of memories. To find that grain... that fact, and recognise the truth in it, that was the true challenge of Legilimency.

But he had never felt a need for knowing that single fact about everybody. He had enough in keeping his own facts where they belonged; In his head, where nobody would ever find them.

Wordcount: 191
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Severus was working his way through the Potions Journals, making note of Belby's associates, co-writers and co-researchers. He tried not to think about what he had said to Remus. That he wouldn't be able to keep fixed schedules. That Remus shouldn't suffer under that fact. That Remus shouldn't be alone. )


Sep. 18th, 2005 10:33 pm
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No internet, so Severus is going offline until further notice. I will try and update with him as soon as possible.

ETA (21. sept - 5.30 pm gmt+1): I have currently access through an internet cafe -__- which means noisy teenagers engrossed in computergames all around me. But I have updated and I'll be available for a couple of hours yet, or as long as I can stand this noise level *g*

I can also - possibly *crosses fingers* - be reached over msn. I'll try to log in at least.
[identity profile] .livejournal.com

He knew that word only too well. Knew what consequences it had imparted on his life. Knew the choices he had made, to reach that point.

Knew the price.

He had paid that price, finally. Given his life, as his betrayal had cost lives... Given his peace of mind, as his betrayal had destroyed that peace in many others ... Given all, as his betrayal had taken all from some...

But would that be enough?

Could he ever repay the damage done by an ambitious and zealous young mind, delivering information he should never have gained in the first place? That he had not known the true implications of? It was ironic in a way, that the price had taken a form that would pose as ultimate betrayal of the only person, who had trusted him enough to forgive that first betrayal.

Guilt was a fruitless emotion and he had long moved past it, not allowing it to settle inside him. What was done, was done. There was no undoing, no spell that could take back the effects. So, this offered no redemption from guilt, for Severus. It only offered a purpose, a way to serve as means to an end, an end that might come sooner than expected.

Or never.

He could only wait.

WC: 216


Aug. 14th, 2005 11:32 pm
[identity profile] .livejournal.com

Soon I won't be able to read any journals at all, with the new fancy styles that have fonts so small, they're unreadable on my screen, due to my screen resolution. I know, I know...change the resolution. But I like it this way and I can have a lot of open IE windows/chat windows/Word and whatnot at the same time, and see most of it at one glance.

And what IS the attraction of a fontsize that equals 6 or less? Or a font type that simply displays like that, even at normal size?

So, I guess I'll just have to accept that some journals I just can't read. Which can become a problem, if it's a character I'm following. But oh well.

ETA: And I really don't get why people want the new style to cover the comment page as well. The old XColibur style is perfectly fine imo. Very much better than anything any of the new styles have provided so far. At least you're not pestered with being sent to a different page to comment, but can see the thread as you reply, instead of having to go back and forth to remember all the details. And the thread is also not mushed together to a mile long single word column when it reaches the right side. And you're also not forced to scroll to the right forEVAH to read the top comments of a long long thread.

Or is it me who's just too fucking conservative? Stupid? Blind? *shrugs*

ETA the second: Repeat after me. Imma is stupid! *Sev nods silently, because he probably knew the solution all along, just didn't share, since he wanted to test how truly stupid his Muggle Bint Mun (tm) is
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
Severus is reading, as Fran swoops into his office, flies over his head - missing it by only a hair's breadth - and lands on his desk.



Jul. 20th, 2005 01:45 am
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Severus Snape will be taking a small hiatus from replying to the TM challenges. But he will be back as soon as his mun has digested all the new info from book 6, probably early August.

Already now I have decided to incorporate the happenings of the book fully in his challenge replies, and as fully as possibly in his rp activities.

The threads he's currently involved in will be completed of course, but I won't be involving him any new ones, until I feel I have a secure grip on his new canon facts.
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
Why isn't my young sev icon showing up? *sighs* This is just a test post

ETA: Of course I can see it here. Why doesn't it work in comments?

*goes off to comment on own post*
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
Shimmering blue, like Mother of Pearl beneath a crisp winter's blue clear sky. The colour was brilliant against the dark red velvet of the table cloth. Like a bright light in darkness. A darkness that went beyond the low light in the room, the black corners and the black robes.

Warning for torture and death )
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
My internet has gone belly up. I've been able to use another computer, but I can't access chat and I can't really 'play' on my Dad's comp *shifty eyes*.

I don't know what's happened, since the help center of my ISP is - as usual - clueless *sighs* It might be my router, it might be the central, it might be gremlins chewing on the cables *flails*

Anyway, I'll try to get on a computer again tomorrow, preferably the net cafe, so I can play again (even though they don't have chat programs anymore). But I can't promise anything.

I'll give a heads up as soon as I'm hooked up again.

ETA: The Parental Units have gone to bed (I'm staying here overnight), leaving me with their computer. Muwaahahahah... ahem. I can play for a bit, until I drop off.
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
The pain in his arm wouldn't ease off. He knew it would soon since the meeting was over, but the knowledge didn't make it any easier. It never did.

This is nothing compared to Remus' pain. He reminded himself, finally knowing that pain after observing it and ... almost feeling it, watching Remus writhe and scream with it that night and the morning after.

But this was his pain, and pain was a subjective matter. In this case even more so, as it symbolised more than a simple physical discomfort. And this was not something he could share with anybody else. It was not a visible transformation or disfiguration that would lend understanding to others, a way for others to visualise what it might be like.

This was just black lines on pale skin, almost seeming innocuous to those who didn't know the deeper implications of the symbol or the magic bound within it. The life bound within it. And death...

With a soft disgusted snort he rose from his chair and moved into the lab. Working would take his mind off the deep feeling of loneliness that suddenly befell him. That always came to him when the mark burned and cut into him, pointing out just how alone he was, standing in the middle between two fronts.

Remus would understand. But Remus didn't need to see him in this state. Nobody did.

"Pity is for the weak, Severus. You are not weak." he berated himself as he looked at the list of potions Madam Pomfrey needed. He had no time for such foolishness. The pain would fade

WC: 268
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Memo to Remus Lupin (Meta of course :D)


You need to come up with some sort of schedule for you 'love' life, don't you? How utterly romantic.


Another one of those meme things that don't make sense )
[identity profile] .livejournal.com
Heart's Desire: Think about something you once wanted so badly but never acquired. Write about how you think your life would've been different if you had received what your heart desired.

The hearts desire of Professor Severus Snape. )

Muse: Severus Snape
Fandom: Harry Potter
Wordcount: 394
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